What is considered as date nowadays?

  • These days, it's very hard to tell the difference between 'hangout' and 'date" when it comes to boy-girl one on one spending time together.

    Please advise!

  • personally wont regard any appointment as dating before an expressed confirmation of the lover relationship..

    so, i only hangout with guys but date my bf

    wat s ur confusion?

  • so you are saying, before the two single people are established as bf/gf, there are no such thing as dates?! Dating is only reserved for official couples?

  • It should only be regarded as a date when a boy, who is in love with the girl, asks the girl out, and the girl, who is in love with the boy, accepts his invitation.

  • ahh so according to prawn sandwich, the boy should initiate a date.

    And what if it was a girl who asked the guy and he accepted it? Do we call that hang out instead?

  • Who initiates the "date" is not important. I still call it a date if it is the girl who initiates it.

    I should have put "vice versa" in my last post !!!

  • 係唔係英文題?

    1. appointment: an appointment to meet somebody for a social or business activity

      I've got a dinner date with a client.

      6. romantic appointment: a romantic engagement with somebody

      I thought we had a date tonight.

  • gimme a break, and leave the word "love" out of the definition.

    a date is simply hanging out with a friend whom you may "one day" have a romantic relationship with.

  • I think love2day's definition makes more sense for nowadays...and that's what i meant earlier about the blending meaning for "hang out' and 'date".

    Date doesn't have to be dinner/movie and it can be as simple as wandering around the streets together, having drinks, that's exactly what a couple of friends would do when they hang out too.

    Am I wrong? or maybe I am just too stupid to separate the two.

  • Call me old fashion or something but I don't agree. A date is a date between 2 lovers and a hangout can be with basically anyone which can end up doing ONS and shag the living datlight out of your brain in a back staircase.

    If you guys call that a date well then so be it but it is blatantly disappointing.

  • gal,

    yes, and a date can be coffee time too.

    two persons are definitely not lovers, and i am very certain of that.

    dating is "trying out".

    "bf" is confirmed and set.

    "lovers" are more committed, not casual.

  • gal, do you have a date now?

  • another big difference between a date (as a person) and a lover; a gal can go on dating with as many guys as she wants.

    and her date (the guy) knowing himself as her date only, should understand without any jealous feeling if she dates other guys. this part is harder for HK men.

  • a date is someone you going out with for fun and to explore the possibility of developing a relationship with.

    bf/gf is someone you date exclusively.

  • If a hangout is like that prawn sandiwich says: "a hangout can be with basically anyone which can end up doing ONS and shag the living datlight out of your brain in a back staircase. "...THEN I am disappointed!

  • gal,

    um.. i am not too sure how it works neither..

    maybe a kiss at the end of the nite?

    but having a date could be quite stressful.. i think just hanging out, getting to know each other is better.

    sigh... who am i to say, i havent had any guys around for a month already :(

    how was ur best date like?

  • that's the thing, when I go out with a guy one on one basis, spending time with him, and do stuff..I don't know whether we are actually on dates or just friendly hangouts because we are normally very casual and laid back about it, not at all stressful or trying to impress one another, very relaxing, can talk about anything at ease.

    The guy still wants to pay for the food/drinks when we go out, and I'd still offer to pay but he just won't take it, that's all. Perhaps a lot of people seem to think that is a date which I wasn't even aware of.

    I have no complaint about that, just curious/confused about the terms people use nowadays. i just thought they are very blended. That's why I brought up the question.

  • come to think of it, perhaps a guy's view can be different from a girl's point of view...let's hear more from the boys! Tell us what they think a date should be.

  • i would say.. if the guy is paying for all the stuffs.. it would be date..

    i dont let a guy pay for me unless i am interested.. i dont want to feel like i am taking advantage of him.

    but guys i did one-on-one with.. insist on paying.. esp. korean guys..

    there was this one guy, he would even offer to pay for my friends, whom we ran into at the resturant.

    ya.. guys.. tell us what u think about this hangout vs. dates

    btw, gal, u r in the states now, rite? sounds like u r

  • Yeah of course there are some guys like to pay for the girl AND their friends too but DON'T let him do that! I have let one slide like that before, he paid for me and my friend and eventually I suffered the most because I didn't like the guy as he me, but having him to paid for both of us, I was sort of stuck between, if you know what I mean? really really terrible, I didn't want him to pay AT ALL!

    Oh yeah I am in US right now, how d;you know though? I can be in canada or even UK for that matter!

  • i dont know.. the way u talk (well.. type rather) is so american..

    and mainly coz i am from the states too.. (east coast)

    anywho, i am done with work.. will msg here again once i get home..

    i am sure u have aim, add me on it if u want (not many ppl from hk has it lol)

    aim: lapommejojo

  • ok I have added you, so i might see you online at home! I actually have my AIM on right now! haha...bye

  • I once heard from a guy before saying that if after the meeting with a girl, if he likes her, then it was a date. But if he doesn't like her that way, he would just tell people he hangs out with a girl as a friend.

    So really is dependent on what the guys feel towards the girls. The definition won't exist until AFTER the meeting! haha bastards!

  • gal.

    well a date nowadays is bascally just a confirmation of a meet between a guy and a gurl. Now what kinda date it is then thats a different matter. can be romantic, can be casual, can be something can be nothing. There is no meaning for just a date, the meaning comes from both parties and each is unique in its own way.

    I think that sums it up pretty good.

  • ya, i agree with langzay,

    dont want to sound like i am bs-ing, but honestly it doesnt matter what it is.. if the sparkles/chemistry r there.. think of it as a date, if not.. a hangout..

    u know, if u like that person, u will start to get a little touchy touchy.. then the romantic eye contacts (yup, i think all gals should learn how to give signals from their eyes ^^), but if u dont feel that way, u will keep it in a reasonable distance.

    its all under our, the gals', control~!! ya, darn right.. hahaa if its a decent guy, he wouldnt make the inital body contacts.

    alrite.. let me conclude, if its a date, there will be body contacts somehow, if not.. then its a hangout..

    how does that sound?

    btw, thanks for adding me, gal,

    tell me what i should call u thru aim, k? :D

  • oh, u know what is the weirdest moment when hanging out (or dating) with a guy..

    i believe its the end of the nite moment.

    i never know if he would kiss me or not.. (i dont mind to tongue on the 1st date.. lol.. i love kissing..hahhaa)

    but sometimes there could be an awkard mo

  • moment

  • alright, I think we all got the idea now and we can close out this topic!

    What's next?


  • Since when westerners put a price tag on everything like the HK people? This weird notion only happens in HK.

    It doesn't matter whether the guy foots the bill or they go dutch.

    The two can go physical or keep it a game of the minds, that depends on how desperate the man (or the woman) is. I guess the gals have a simply rule of no kiss on the mouth in the 1st 3 dates.

  • Of course, if the guy wants to leave a good impression, he wouldb't mind to give her a treat. She may generously suggest to buy him a drink afterwards.

    That's how it was done in the old days...

  • lulalulo

    haha u agree.... u from where? overseas or hk. dont sound or feel u from hk hahahaha........kissing on the first date, well depends on the guy..if shy or not. u like make first move or wait guy to.. i think some guys scared t mostly coz they think too many steps ahead and scared gurl would reject them.


    what topic now

    how about to kiss or not to kiss

  • langzay,

    ya, i am not from hk, i am in new york now :D

    well... i dont know what to say, usually the guy will put the move.. but if i like the guy, i usally will send out some signals..

  • lulalulo

    Hi! What signal would you give to a guy u like?

    If u dun like a guy, but he tell u that he likes u. Would u still hangout with him? or avoid him?

  • kc,

    signals..? um.. usually, me and the guy will stay in his car to a small chat before i get off his car.. i will play with his hand a little.. and lean a bit closer to him...

    the other way.. i guess i will look straight to his eyes.. have more of a seductive look... i am sure the guy will know what i am expecting..

    by the way, i will never ever be the first one to inital a kiss :D

    if a guy i dont like tell him he has a crush on me? um.. it really depends.

    if he is a nice guy, i will keep him around as friends..

    but if he is a bit weird or too agressive, i will keep a distance.

    but of course, if he makes completely no potential date material, i will tell him straight up that i am not interested.


  • lulalulo

    hahaha well if a gurl was to send some signals the guy should pick em up and make his move, ever so sutlely so thatthe gurl won't think he is coming on to fast adn too eager hehehe. Well difference when ur overseas is that u dont have the need or urge to rush it, but if ur in hk most guys rush into it and ruins the anticipation of a romance, i think.......any thoughts from hk ppl

  • langzay,

    um.. come to think of it, i havent dated any fobby hk guy before, maybe they r different from the guys i've met in new york.

    well.. guys i met here.. well.. a lot of them r agressive and seems a bit desperate too (esp. the korean guys)

    but there r some guys that r quite gentlemen like, they dont put a move coz not many girls will want to kiss on the first date.

  • lulalulo

    Ha! Every normal guy should receive your signal!

    Thank you! Is it possible for a friend to "upgrade" to boyfriend, or never possible?

  • lulalulo

    You're a girl in New York? I am thinking of SATC... haha!

  • kc,

    depends what kind of friend he is..

    if he is just a hi-bye friend, or u r not too close to him, i am sure its possible, coz once u get to know him more, u might fall for him.

    but if its a close friend, i guess it would be very hard to develop from friendship to a relationship..

    well,, thats how i see it.. i am sure u guys think of it differently :D

  • kc,

    hahhaha ya.. that.. without a nice apt and brand name clothes and shoes..

  • lulalulo

    But close friend is still better than nothing. If u like someone, and u know u couldn't be his girlfriend. Would u willing to keep the friendship, or try not to see him at all?

    haha! It depends, maybe at some moment I would have a special feeling to a already close friend.

    haha! Wish u getting those soon!

  • kc,

    um.. i have never had that.. maybe its coz i've been in a girls school for 10 yrs,

    for me, all my close friends r gals.

    but if i were u and i kinda sensed that my friend is interested too.. then i will go for it,

    good luck la :D

  • lulalulo

    there korean guys here? thought only a chinese or hkie site . sho what u do in ny?

    study or work?

login to reply

looks like your connection to she.com messageboard was lost, please wait while we try to reconnect.