Why



  • 我已婚,有自己的住所,我有細路,都幾精靈,我同內子亦很融洽。

    我有朋友,亦有相交卅年的知己。

    我有工作,足夠一家糊口。

    我亦有SL,不經不覺已相戀十年了,感情有增無減。

    但我仍會覺得悶,會感到寂寞,點解?

    我都有係SHE同人玩過,但開心過後一樣感到空虛…

    請問你地有無同樣的情況?



  • 不如跟人返教會,尋找番心靈上既滿足...



  • Dont bull s on whatever reasons you find for yourself, simply. Because you are human, you either control your desire, don't blame on it, or enjoy the way you like



  • I do hv husband and sl, and i also like to meet guys to fill up the gaps in between.





    I dont feel that kind of lonely as you do, but i just enjoy meeting ppl who cares about me, who put their attention on me and who wants me.


    I think I am just being greedy and enjoy life, its nothing wrong as far as you are able to manage it. Dont let it get out of control, you will be in trouble!



  • Yes


    I had SL before but feel even more lonly after break up


    U know that wont last long anyway



  • Ayisha, nice read, and lovely mindset, I can't agree more!





    And I said if we can handle it well, we can enjoy both good and dark size, more from my experience, it can help to ease my marriage. Because I understand more what person I am..



  • Sound fancy, ayisha, ginna, I wish to fill up u gap too,



  • 相傳宋仁年間,深澤某村,一家人只有母子兩個人,母親年邁多病,不能幹活,日子過得很苦,兒子王妄,三十歲,沒討上老婆,靠賣草來維持生活。





    有一天,王妄照舊到村北去拔草,拔著拔著,發現草叢裏有一條七寸多長的花斑蛇,渾身是傷,動彈不得,王妄動了憐憫之心,小心翼翼地拿回了家,沖洗塗藥,一會功夫,蛇便蘇醒了,沖著王妄點了點頭,表達它的感激之情,母子倆見狀非常高興,趕忙為它編了一個小荊簍,小心地把蛇放了進去,從此母子倆精心護理,蛇傷逐漸痊癒,蛇也長大了,而且總像是要跟他們說話似的,很能可愛,母子倆單調寂寞的生活中增添了點小小的樂趣,日子一天天過去,王妄照樣打草,母親照樣守家,小蛇整天在簍裏。忽一天,小蛇覺得悶在屋子裏沒意思,爬到院子裏曬太陽,被 陽光一照變得又粗又長,象根大樑,這情形被老娘看見了驚叫一聲昏死過去,等王妄回來,蛇已回到屋裏,恢復了原形,著急地說:「我今天失理了,把母親給嚇死過去了,不過別怕,你趕快從我身上取下三塊小皮,再弄些野草,放在鍋裏煎熬成湯,讓娘喝下去就會好。」王妄說:「不行,地樣會傷害你的身體,還是想別的辦法吧!」花斑蛇催促地說:「不要緊,你快點,我能頂得住。」王妄只好流著眼淚照辦了。母親喝下湯後,很快蘇醒過來,母子倆又感激又納悶,可誰也沒說什麼,王妄再一回想每天晚上蛇簍裏放金光的情形,更覺得這條蛇非同一般。





    話說宋仁宗整天不理朝政,宮裏的生活日復一日,沒什麼新樣,覺得厭煩,想要一顆夜明珠玩玩,就張貼告示,誰能獻上一顆,就封官受賞。這事傳到王妄耳朵裏,回家對蛇一說,蛇沉思了一會兒說:「這幾年來你對我很好,而且有救命之恩,總想報答,可一直沒機會,現在總算能為你做點事了。實話告訴你,我的雙眼就是兩棵夜明珠,你將我的一只眼挖出來,獻給皇帝,就可以升官發財,老母也就能安度晚年了。」王妄聽後非常高興,可他畢竟和蛇有了感情,為忍心下手,說:「那樣做太殘忍了,你會疼的受不了的。」蛇說:「不要緊,我能頂住。」於是,王妄挖了蛇的一只眼睛,第二天到京城,把寶珠獻給民皇帝,滿朝文武從沒見過這麼奇異的寶珠,讚不絕口,到了晚上,寶珠發出奇異的光彩,把整個宮廷照得通亮,皇帝非常高興,封王妄為進行大官,並賞了他很多金銀財寶。





    皇上看到寶珠後,很賞識,占為已有,西宮娘娘見了,也想要一顆,不得已,宋仁宗再次下令尋找寶珠,並說把丞相的位子留給第二個獻寶的人,王妄想,我把蛇的第二只眼睛弄來獻上,那丞相不就是我的了嗎?於是到皇上面前說自己還能找到一顆,皇上高興地把丞相給了他,可萬沒想到,王妄的衛士去取第二只眼睛時,蛇無論如何不給,說非見王妄才行,王妄只好親自來見蛇。蛇見了王妄直言勸到:「我為了報答你,已經獻出了一只眼睛,你也升了宮,發了財,就別在要我的第二只眼睛了。人不可貪心。」王妄早已官迷心竅,那時還聽得進去,無恥地說:「我不是想當丞相嗎?你不給我怎麼能當上呢?況且,這事我已跟皇上說了,官也給了我,你不給不好收場呀,你就成全了我吧!」他執意要取第二只眼睛,蛇見他變得這麼貪心殘忍,早氣壞了,就說:「那好吧!你拿刀子去吧!不過,你要把我放到院子裏去再取。」王妄早已等待不得,對蛇的話也不分析,一口答應,就把蛇放到了陽光照射的院子裏,轉向回屋取刀子,等他出來剜寶珠時,蛇身已變成了大樑一般,張著大口沖他喘氣,王妄嚇的魂都散了,想跑已來不及,蛇一口就吞下了這個貪婪的人。





    (轉自學佛網:http://big5.xuefo.net/show1_11070.htm)



  • Hollowman, ginna,


    你引用呢個故事想說明得一想二必自斃,做人不可以貪心既道理,我明白的。但人總會有陰暗既一面,絕大多數人都會貪心的。


    幾年前,我又識了一個單身剛失戀既女仔,熟落後有了感情,最後做埋SL。果時真係同一時間應付兩個SL,是很吃力的。好彩她們兩個都好體貼,我先manage到。但每次見完呢個女仔,我內心都覺得對吾住第一個SL,感到內疚。幾年後,呢個女仔搵到男朋友了,我們的關係才結束,但現在仍是好朋友。得一想二諗係好開心,但要維持就吾易。加上有D嘢開左個頭吾係話結束就可以結束的。


    Ayisha, 你有丈夫,又有SL,你搵人fill up the gaps in between後會感到對你的SL內疚的嗎?




  • no name,





    the article i posted is very long, thanks for your reading time.





    the snake in the article can be a person or evil mind or anything that we can think of.





    as we want many, so we feel powerless to satify ourself... consequently we feel hollowness when we are standing in crowd and alone, the snake is swallowing us.





    lunch time, i am hungry enough to swallow an elephant. :P




  • Ayisha replied at 2010-09-29 3:53 pm


    -----------------------------------------------------------------


    I do hv husband and sl, and i also like to meet guys to fill up the gaps in between.





    I dont feel that kind of lonely as you do, but i just enjoy meeting ppl who cares about me, who put their attention on me and who wants me.


    I think I am just being greedy and enjoy life, its nothing wrong as far as you are able to manage it. Dont let it get out of control, you will be in trouble!


    =================================================================


    Hi, Ayisha, I am having the exactly same situation. Mind made a friend with me (a female)?



  • Connie,


    This is a kind of life. Must be enjoy, no regret. How's your situation now?



  • connie


    maybe, you would feel better to go do some volunteer works?



  • Ben. I am fine but just sometimes could not fee him. I am a very passionate person and would like my partner acting the same.


    noone. I have done a lot of these before. Now I really have no time to do this.



  • Connie,


    I can sense and agreed that caring should be interactive. It is not workable in single way. That's the reason why there are lots of opportunity for all of us to fill the gap.



  • connie,





    then how long you come togehter with your SL?



  • connie


    how could you have time for sl's? if u are so busy?



  • no name


    it's amazing that your sl's relationship can last for such an long time. Mind to share with us on how does you guys maintained it for this long?



  • no name





    I want to know too. How to keep such long secret relationship?



  • hi angle


    i have such experience before


    can we chat?


    bull2345@hotmail.com



  • Angel





    Are you married and looking for sl too. Keeping such a long secret relationship is not easy, I tried before, but just only last for a year.



  • Noone,





    I dont know how to say, but i think the followings may be helpful.





    1. She is your lover, not for sex.


    2. The relationship is only between me and her, I will not explose our relationship to anyone who know both of us


    3. Be patient and considerate


    4. Similar background (we both married)


    5. Dont take any photo


    6. Prepare a model answer together in case your SL's wife or husband call you.










  • no name


    thanks for the advice.


    yeah, i think similar background (both married) are essential.



  • no name


    but still 10 yrs isnt a short span in time. it's admirable that yours can lasted. i suppose. ^^



  • Sorry, angel,


    I havent seen your messenge when i reply noone. Hope you find it useful from my words.





    Sam, you are welcome to share ur experience with us here.





    Morphis, try again.




  • No Name,


    thanks for the list of tips, I also think it is important to be able to keep the relationship strickly secret for it to be able to continue.


    As with any relationship, being considerate and kind to each other is a necessity.


    There must be something other than sex keeping two people together, otherwise the sex just fizzles out really fast



  • no name


    your world seem colorful enough. still want someone to color your world even more?



  • noone





    are you married also? do you have a sl before too ?



  • Yes, Peter,





    Sex actually is not important between me and her.



  • morphis


    why? does it matter?



  • no name


    perhaps, u possessed too much in life already. lonliness served u right.



  • perhaps lonliness is just another feeling that one should treasure and experience as well, they make for a good contrast with fufilment. This way you know how good the rest of your life is!


    Even the emporers of old went to buddhist retreats and ate vegetarian once in a while to cleanse their souls



  • Noone,





    coluerful? I dont know...


    maybe I still want "play", or maybe i feel lonely when she is not besides me.


    When she is busy in her work, i want find someone...


    but after that i feel guilty.



  • Peter and Noone,





    I will think about your words, thanks.



  • no name


    if u still wanna play. play you go then.


    but it might be dire consequences later, just an reminder!



  • typo


    it might have*



  • noone





    just to see if you are the same kind or not. As people who got married for long are always feeling bored and lonely



  • morphis


    i have been there n done that before, and my sl's was single.



  • We are together for 8 months only, still in the stage of getting use to each other. Agree with you that sex is not the most important thing between us.



  • connie


    any regrets? was it an happy occassion?



  • noone





    so you don't have any sl now? What do you feel of having a sl ?



  • morphis


    mind sharing us your experiences too?



  • morphis


    my experiences sxxks. wkakakaka.........



  • typo


    sxxk*


    why they censored the word 'sxxk'?



  • noone





    i got several sl before, but always can't keep it long, and the longest one was only last for a year. I think it was because most of them were single, and they would give up the relationship once they found a permanent one.





    are you single or married?



  • Connie





    so you are still keeping with your sl ? Everything is smooth? 8 months is not short already for that relationship



  • morphis replied at 2010-09-30 3:55 pm


    -----------------------------------------------------------------


    Connie





    so you are still keeping with your sl ? Everything is smooth? 8 months is not short already for that relationship


    =================================================================


    Yes but his emotion is always up and down. I think it is because he is still single and I am married.



  • morphis


    am i married? use your logic!



  • connie


    he behave that way, coz he love you.



  • Hi ladies,



    Not easy to fall in love again. This does not only apply to ladies, but guys as well. 



    I think when people get older, the have done what they like to do. Remember, in the old days when I was a kid, I was very happy when I bought a CD or a pair of new sports shoe. I dont feel the happiness when I do the same thing. It becomes part of my daily life to buy things repeatedly.



    This same logic applies to our emotion. We love and we hurt. And broken up and find another lover. Over and over again, we fall in love and finally got married. Everything is repeating and we no longer have the feeling we used to have. 



    Greedy is a human nature (esp. in a capitalist city). After marriage, we look for SL and hope to satisfy our dark hole inside our heart. The hole become bigger and bigger, and we feel more loneliness.  And most of all, it is not easy to get ourselves satisfied, let alone our emotional or physical relationship (bf/gf, SL, SP, etc)



    Well, i am also just a human being and have the above natural desire in my heart as like everyone of you here in she.com



    fateconnectus@hotmail.com



    Hermond