He said I am the best but he couldnt offer more in the relationship



  • We broke up yesterday, tears are in my heart, wish there was a place I could hide and cried out loudly! Been together with him about 2 years, everything was fantastic but we ended up since he said he is not sure what he wants? He needs some change for his life?? to be a play boy or be a better person for his friends and his family?? 



    Should I forget him or give myself a chance to see to wait, I know that is ridiculous by saying that but everyone here who has similar experience would agree with me? I just couldnt get out of the situation, I miss him, I wish I was the only person he was missing but .....







  • I have written this email but wont send it out:





    Today is the first day we really broke up! Tears in my heart and I could hardly do anything, I know you have made the decision and that was the way you wanted, You are tired with our relationship and you can NOT resist outside temptation, You are right Lily is not an issue, there would be A, B, C.....





    I should forget you, even though gonna be tough and dont know how long it will take.





    Had little food swallowed, nothing excited me everything around me seems dead, I am still hoping and waiting, is there any chance you will get me back when you are tired and want to stop seeking for excitment?





    If anywhere I can hide and cry alone? Tears come out whenever I think of you! You really do torture me! I want to get out of here.





    Guess you dont care me any more, You have not contacted me since yesterday, even a text, but I still miss you so much, I dont know what to do???



  • Can anyone talk to me please?



  • Seems there is no turning back at this stage. He has probably done something unfaithful to you to be saying such things. The best advice I can offer is this: Keep away from him now, give him some space and time to sort things out first. Emailing/phoning him all the time to beg him to take you back is only gonna push him away further. Just let time do the healing and if he really loves you deep inside, he will comeback for you. TRUST ME!



  • trust me, he must already have had another gf.



  • 底死!又有港女比人飛.



  • just let him go if he could get what he wants in another relationship.



  • thank you guys replied and advice, I didnt call nor email to him today, I didnt even say goodbye last night when we went home, He kissed me and said See you but I didnt turn back.





    He always has many girls around, not only his good looking also his nice personality and his job. He said he didnt want to hurt me so we should break up..




  • I was in your boyfriend's situation a few years back but I chose to come back to my girlfriend after one year of breaking up. So don't give up just yet, anything's possible. Just don't get your hopes too high and let it be no matter what happens.



  • One year? gonna be a long life time to wait! but I am glad you got back to your gf eventually, I could tell how tough was your gf had been...





    I should give up but just somehow still hoping, He is too much in my life, so sad.



  • Was sort of on and off during that one year. We still met up as friends during that time. So it was ok....





    It's always hard when you first break up, but as time goes on it will be easier. Focus on something else for now, i.e. work, friends, family, etc..



  • Thanks Ivan, you really help me while I am in such frustrated, We wont stop seeing each other completely as still having so much connection there, But gonna be in different way which will drive me crazy.





    My world is blue though.



  • Just be brave and tomorrow will be a new day for you. Don't let your world evolve around "him".



  • 舊的唔去, 新的不來


    人要向前看


    今日他說你不是他的理想


    難保他朝你亦會多謝他今日的決定而令你遇到真命天子



  • Hi pretty lady, nice to meet you.





    add me for some soul chat





    msn: goforit1980@hotmail.com



  • hi , i was the same, i broke up 3 wks ago, time passed so fast


    really understand your feeling now,


    I was so sad and cry for 2 days, sent him lots of sms , but he did not reply at all, now when i look back , i should not sent those msg to him and make him think that he is the only one in my life.





    Although i still miss him and want to contact him , but i force myself not to do so.





    Time will wash your tears and memories......







  • Hi ladies,





    give me the chances to take care all of you. ok?



  • went gym for a while just trying to get rid of the thought of him but still cant let go!!!!





    Have been checking emails sms but all are disappointments, nothing from him, I told myself thousand times to stop thinking that is the only thing I should do I cant beg him back, meaningless and if so would not last long.



  • It's another long night gonna keep me awake.



  • o_9





    Thanks. have just read ur thread, sorry for us, but no regret, I still love him even though he gave me so much pain...



  • namastewitchy,


    佢都咁受女性歡迎, 同佢繼續一齊, 其實你都要有心理準備, 佢未必完完全全屬於你



  • Actually it was me who asked to end up the relationship 2 weeks ago coz I really fed up to guess who he was going out with, there are always so many girls around, And he always grants favour to whoever asks for it....





    Our first broke up lasted two days only and we got back together again, but the problem still there never been solved, I could tell he no longer put his heart on me, He met one girl used to work together and they slept that night - the second day after our 1st broke up.





    I was hopeless for being a silly girl to keep quiet for 2 weeks till last night. I know there is no end for worries if I keep this relationship, I will never know when he has other gf.













  • At least he was being honest in telling you that he had slept with another girl the next day after you two broke up.





    So how long have you two been together for?



  • I sometimes wish he shouldnt have been so honest though I was appreciated the way he was.





    Whatever, now we have broken up he can do whatever he wants, no need to concern if makes me mad.







  • hi, I am gal too, and also just broke up. I understand that it hurt, and it's really hard to accept and overcome, but I'll try my best. Maybe we can join together for some drink, gym, etc? Just want to be brave to our road ahead.



  • I am dying for his message but he hasn't contacted me since the day we separated. Should I give him a text or it is too stupid to go this step?



  • still in so much pain, couldnt breath and do anything.



  • I understood your feeling as I experienced the same now. All the ppl around me advised me not to do anything but waited. However, like u, I can't stop myself for doing something, it seems too desperate just wait and when waiting and no contact, the feeling of everything is over terrified me.





    So I sms, call, and no response. Finally I reached him but still, not meaningful as definitely he is not ready. Now I was waiting and the longer time it is, the preparation for breakup I know.





    Therefore, my suggestion is, if u really can't control, just sms him, but not push him, say something caring and that's all. But be prepared, sometimes it is not easy to change his mind if he has already made the decision.



  • Thanks Forget.





    I didnt send him sms finally, thought not a good idea to approach him before he does, so I will just wait and see.





    Thanks guys.



  • I am getting nervous now, very uncomfortable feeling bugging me, He should say something after few days away and quiet, I dont know how long I can wait before going crazy.



  • u know, we haven't contact formally starting from 31 July. u should know how sad I am. Out of control, I send him just a junk email. To me, I should know everything is over, but just not ready to accept it..



  • He wont ignor me if I call or text him but I just dont want to go this step, We dont hate each other or there are something really bad between us, So I am still hoping he will give me a call at least just a hi!





    I will accept the situation definately if he doesnt call me today, because that means I am out of his life.



  • Sometimes it is better to know sooner than later. After all, short pain is better than long term torture. You never know who you'll come across next. I broke up a couple of years ago, must have felt like you but now I have found an upgrade! my bf is much better than my ex. Now looking back how good that break up decision was. Remember, there is nothing more important than treating yourself well, and he doesn't deserve the kind of attention if you're dismay. Let the past go and look forward to a brighter future!



  • yes speak right








    add oil and have a brighter future








    God bless you!



  • thanks b_001. I know many gals here have had same experiences and all could overcome, I guess I will be one day, just crossing my fingers.....



  • Its just the problem of happening now, "now" is in fact the only reason why you are dismay. After a few days to cool down when you look back early next week you'll feel the relief of an end to something that is meant to end. Remember, he is NOT the only one around and I believe NOT the best either, meaning there is a good chance that better boys are out there. The past is quite meaningless now except that we can learn from it so that we can improve ourselves, but other than that there isn't really anything to be sad about (the past). You deserve to be treated well so you need to take the responsibility of treating yourself well: keep yourself happy, rest for a few days then look around for someone even better!



  • You are right, I am now living in the "past" which is gone and meaningless if i keep myself so down, friends say to me "find another guy is the best way to kill your pain" though they are right but i will not be able to get into another relationship so soon, I have no confidence on guys or even myself.





    I thank for your advice, i will keep asking myself to cheer up, he is not the best and i dserve the best one.



  • namastewitchy, u are so brave. In my case, we didn't hate each other too, but just he did something wrong and can't forgive himself that he chose to leave. He found hard to face me.





    I don't know should I keep on waiting for him, or just leave it...







  • "Iam getting -I dont know how long I can wait before going crazy...what is that? you said u guys were bk-up! so just leave him alone..from what you have mention I don;t think he is respecting you a bit!! those were not honest behaviour! that is insulting you! therefore you should respect urself!


    Here is some advice for you! 1. Buy a new phone. (you can still keep the old phone but don;t open it during this period), 2. I guess you seldom have a tea or dinner with your parents or relatives. go and visit them!! u know those peopel wont betray you. 3. change your hair style.4.. Buy a tempo ....smell it deeply!! wakaaa wakaaaaa



  • Right, finding an upgrade is a good thing to do, but not urgent. "When" isn't that important but "who" is.


    A note to forget: waiting is meaning since the truth is now known. its much better to "wait" for someone good than to go back to someone who you know has guilt.



  • dear caymans, you made me laughing - buy a tempo....smell it deeply! gonna do it right now.





    Tell you a secret, I turned off my phone in the first day we broke up and wish I got his call or whatever, but nope!!! Then I kept waiting everyday till now, nothing from him, so i should wake up and I dont think I need a new phone.





    And I just changed my hairstly last month, so probably to cut it to very short.





    Will have dinner with my family.







  • There you are, so now you know he doesn't even show any caring. I don't think he deserves your attention at all so nothing needs to be done "for him". Just do everything to keep you happy would be the best thing now



  • Yup, he doesnt care of me anymore... sad but I got to accept it.



  • forget, let's stop thinking and waiting, we deserve happy and we should be happy.





    Namaste.



  • Namaste, thanks. I am fluctuating, sometimes I do make up my mind to give up, however, when friends told me that he is not bad and I should wait, I am hesitating again.





    Anyway, thanks for your support during this period, this really make me better. I would try to cheer myself up.



  • that is great! 2morrow is another day! Remember keep a tempo in ur purse n u wont get a curse!!! Be happy!!! Tell you a secret. I experienced the same as you b4. but I am a guy only!!! and that time i was using 7 days!! so won;t work 2 much!!wakaaaaa wakaaaa!! Well Cheers!!



  • Just don't understand what you are waiting. There is nothing for you to wait!





    "You are the best but I couldn't offer more" - this is only a standard and decent excuse for people who want to break up beautifully and gentlely.







  • I know he is selfish to say so just wanted to make himself to feel better.





    Thanks guys, your posts are something so important for me, highly appreciated and I should let it go, no more stupid waiting.










  • I was OK last night, didnt think too much and slept a bit better than last few days, but NOW again I am so frustrated! I made an anonymous call but he didnt answer! My god! I dont know what I am doing now? I miss him so much, I dont know how to get rid of him from my mind?





    What should I do???????



  • When your friends commented "he is not bad", that is only the good side they can see, but only YOU can see the ugly side. It seems that your friends haven't seen the whole story behind. So now you should be convinced that its time for you to look for someone better rather than circling around the past, which, after all wasn't exactly what you want anyway


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