老公同前女友偷偷contact(因為知我接受唔到), 我覺得個女人在等chance,但老公對我幾好,唔似有嘢. 咁可以原諒嗎? 我應該點做好? 大家可以比喲意見我嗎?





  • how did you find out? does your husband know that you found out about it?




  • He knew. I found out from his mobile log. what do you think?



  • 其實我唔明,個女人why係都要保持朋友關係? 都分開咗四五lin.



  • 咁你相信你老公嗎? 你信任他嗎?











    我有時都會同ex bf聯絡下, 不過都係交流下音樂, 電腦, toys既野姐. 有聯絡, 唔代表有路.



  • 保持朋友關係無問題, 不過真係要自控. 如果稍有寂寞時候, 好容易出事, 一切要睇個男人愛個老婆有幾多, 同個女人夠唔夠理智/有無體諒個老婆.





    稍有差池, 就會出事.



  • one eye is open, one eye is close.



  • 我當然唔係太信任佢, 因為那個女人曾經係三者, 後來我老公choose me back. 所以我甘驚. 雖然現在we己結婚, 但佢dei點可以keep contact.



  • why close eye? very unfair.



  • 建議不要做以下的事,否則無事都變有事:


    1. 大吵大鬧


    2. 興師問罪


    3. 直接告訴他做錯了、怪責他


    4. 限制他的活動


    5. 說那個女人的不是





    建議做的事:


    1. 讓他知道你知道這件事(即是叫他不要隱瞞)


    2. 讓他"感覺"到你為了這件事而不開心、受委屈(即扮可憐)


    3. 讓他知道你沒有為此而責怪他(即扮大方)


    4. 讓他"體會"到他做的事令你傷心(即是令他有罪疚感,對你不起)


    5. 讓他知道你已經盡了自己的能力,但仍不能釋懷 (即是吿訴他要想辦法,要有行動表示)


    6. 給他適當的時間


    7. 接受他們好偶然的聯絡





    以退為進. 大男人喜歡保護弱小, 只要令他每每聯絡ex時想起你的委屈, 他會自動疏離她.


    當然, 這假設你老公還是疼愛你的.




  • 發現有contact 己數次, 大吵大鬧 有, 傷心流淚有, 每隔一段long period, 就會發現一兩個短信或者電郵. 雖然內容都很general, 但有喲由那女人發出的卻很令我誤會, 我覺得佢知道我有時會check我老公喲log. 老公曾經說很對不起那人, 所以那女人contact 我老公時, 只會好耐唔耐覆佢. 其實由一開始相信是那女人主動要保持contact, 但我很怕, 難度一直忍受 忍讓?



  • 只會好耐唔耐覆�





    >>> 你老公講你聽?



  • ask yr husband, if i keep contact with my ex bf or even a male friend like you, what do u think?





    i would keep distance if my ex bf already has gf/wife.







  • i think a guy / a girl would keep distance if his/her ex has another half. That's why I think she is skeptical. even if i ask him how he thinks to he's the victim, i know he won't understand.





    女人, 我只是推測, 因為我老公似係好career-oriented 咁, 佢自己都忍受唔到為這類問題煩. 而且we成日together, 我應該會feel到.



  • this situation, should i STILL be considerate to him?



  • 叫佢改電話..直頭叫佢斷絕來往..



  • right!



  • 我好想大家比多喲意見我, 到底我request no more contact, 合唔合理?





    唔可以change phone no, no use, 因為佢唔想咁絕, 而且個no. 用咗好耐.



  • 建議做的事:


    1. 讓他知道你知道這件事(即是叫他不要隱瞞)


    2. 讓他"感覺"到你為了這件事而不開心、受委屈(即扮可憐)


    3. 讓他知道你沒有為此而責怪他(即扮大方)


    4. 讓他"體會"到他做的事令你傷心(即是令他有罪疚感,對你不起)


    5. 讓他知道你已經盡了自己的能力,但仍不能釋懷 (即是吿訴他要想辦法,要有行動表示)


    6. 給他適當的時間


    7. 接受他們好偶然的聯絡





    以退為進. 大男人喜歡保護弱小, 只要令他每每聯絡ex時想起你的委屈, 他會自動疏離她.


    當然, 這假設你老公還是疼愛你的.








    by 男人 - 02/26/07 16:59





    This is exactly what my exbf's wife did. And my exbf stopped contacts with me. I dont care cos i didnt love him anymore, just felt sad that i lost a very good friend.


    However, after 5 years of no contact, he called me one day and we talked on the phone for 5 hours like we never aparted. So strange. What im trying to say is you can stop their contact and make yourself feel good, but you may killed a friendship of your husband which he valued a lot.



  • 男人都係對以前d女人絕唔起....可笑!





    觀察下啦, as long as佢未做成滋擾都靜觀其變...





    其實我俾唔到意見你, 我自己都因為第三者婚姻失敗



  • one time that woman yelled at him on the phone (that time he confront me to talk with her over the phone, ask her not to call him anymore), then she was saying that why so good to me but treating her so bad. after that time, she occassionaly tried to send some strange msg to my husband in order to 刺激我. but that stop for a long period of time, then lately i found out they msg'd again.



  • Also something you may consider, if i loved my exbf, i wouldnt break up with him, and his wife would never get him. But our friendship was very special to both of us. Actually he told me that it's a big loss of his life that he couldnt have me as his friend.







  • Maybe my case was different, cos i never wanted him back, i just wanted him as a friend.





    If your husband's exgf wanted him back, then it's different story.



  • my case, i don't think i want them to stop contact is to make myself just to feel good. I feel insecure because the wound on me is still on, i can't bear it at this moment. because the msg bettween them appear time by time, even though it's rare, but everytime i'm about to forget, the evidence found again. it's a bitter job to stay with someone you don't know what he's doing in behind. if he didn't deny it (until i found out the evidence), if he explains it clear and let me know what's in behind between them, i'll feel better. but i'm the one to find it out. i don't know it's just a pure friendship or not. and since she is the 3rd person, she almost broke my relationship, why should i still take care of my husband feeling? and as the fact that, i really don't know if he really treasure that as a friendship or something else.



  • 女人, 你前夫choose that woman?





    my case, i think my case is the reverse case, because it's my husband choose to give up that relationship. when the first time I realize the affair, i left him. but he made up his mind and quit that relationship. actaully he did a lot in order to build my trust again. just that from time to time, that woman contacts my husband again. i think she is serious to my husband too, otherwise, she would've left when she got dumped. all i can see if she does a lot in order to get him back.



  • 飛左�


    呢d賤男要唔落



  • 係呀!



  • 但我都insist離婚, 受不了.



  • 女人, if i were you, i'd divorce too. 婚姻無法免強. 但我唔明既然佢choose me, why still contact her. is that possible be a pure friendship?



  • 男人的想法和女人的很不同, 你不明白他選擇了你但仍然要和她聯絡, 為什麼背著你跟她通訊, 又不肯承認, 為什麼不能跟她斷絕來往, 為了一個所謂的朋友搞到夫妻不和。你會覺得這個女人是第三者, 破壞你們的生活; 她一日出現在你們中間, 問題是永遠沒辦法解決; 她的出現, 影響了你們的感情。





    同樣的事件, 男人的想法跟女性的想法會很大的出入。請不要去想誰是誰非, 而實實在在的就是兩性的思考和處理的方法是不一樣。





    我猜想你先生(我想是大多數男人)同樣的不明白, 為什麼你那麼討厭她, 她只是普通朋友而已; 因為你不喜歡, 我已沒有主動聯絡她; 我又沒有做過對你不起的行為, 是她主動聯絡我, 我也沒辦法; 我也嘗試坦白的對你說, 但結果並不理想, 所以我認為說出來是可免則免... 奈何你卻發現了, 說也死不說也死... 為什麼你這麼大反應呢? 你太多疑了, 是不必要的...








    我是這樣看的:


    1. 若果沒有發現其他的證據, 我覺得你老公跟她只是普通朋友;


    2. 如果你要你老公跟她絕交, 這是一件很難做到的事情。難度在於一個男人, 如果沒有跟朋友結怨反目, 姑勿論這個朋友是男是女, 他做不出跟這個朋友絕交。如果你要求, 他或會應承你(出於被迫或自願), 不會再找這個朋友, 但朋友找他, 他做不到當口拒絕, 因他缺乏一個"合理"絕交的理由。


    3. 你老公覺得這件事的問題是你和他的ex的對立, 最好處理方法就不讓你知道, 免得令你引起"不必要"的爭吵





    不知道你是否接受這套男人思維, 或者從女性角度看這是不可思議. 但相對的, 男性也會覺得女性這樣的想法不可思議. 我不是為你先生說什麼好話, 只是想帶出這個角度去看這件事; 這個不牽涉誰愛不愛誰的問題, 而是兩性之間的處事及理解會有很大的差落。 如果事情如我所說, 即是你先生對那個ex沒有任何意思, 但雙方卻因為此而偒害到感情, 那就會很可惜了。





    當然, 你的不安和不悅的心情是實在, 你需要去發洩、傾訴; 但你最終要的是你先生給的信心和安全感。我相信只要你有了信心和安全感, 你懶得理他聯絡與否。這是你先生要解決事情的焦點, 但他可能放錯在妻子和朋友相處的關係上。而這兩樣感覺對男性來說比較抽像, 要他感受到你同等的不安和不悅是困難的。 他是知道但未必感受到, 所以我之前的建議都是要他跟你的感覺同步, 這樣他才領悟到和做出你需要的感覺。





    你試想想, 撇除了你先生跟這個女子的聯絡, 你覺得他的為人及對你好嗎? 你覺得他會做出對不起你的事嗎? 你女性的直覺會告訴你。





    不要因為男人的不同思維而怪責他... 他會覺得自己想的是正確... 直到他明白到你的思法和感受到你的需要.




  • thx 男人 and totally agree with your point of view.


    男人同女人真係兩種完全不同既動物, 唔知點解個天要將佢哋拉埋一齊. 搞笑!



  • 我同 ex 分開了七年, 七年來一直有聯絡,


    我同佢之間沒有了愛情, 對佢,


    只係一個很了解我的摰友...





    我地無所不談, 佢同女友之間的相處(第二及第三任)...


    女友無啦啦發脾氣...


    婆媳之間既相處...


    計劃結婚...


    求婚...


    準備婚禮...


    買樓...


    搵銀行做按揭...


    通通我都知得一清二楚,


    相反, 我既所有佢都一清二楚,


    咁又代表甚麼,


    各有各既生活, 各有各既愛人,


    各有各既將來, 朋友就係咁, 分享.. 閒談..


    已經唔再係以前既舊女友/男友既關係.







  • 又作古







  • 男人對愛過既女人係有一份憐惜


    夠堅定既就無事, 做真正好朋友, 我自己都有呢類朋友


    唔夠堅定就好易出事.



  • cc:





    i'm going thr the extact same thing as you do... what's more is that he slapped me becoz i said i wasn't happy that the woman still sms him....





    what should i do then?



  • e


    分手, 有咁快走咁快, 因為he slapped me



  • dfng oewo glsoes sdoet gdour sdgouew dsour gour sdouq sdour gfur



  • cc,如果妳真係因為呢樣野唔開心,我覺得妳應該直接同妳老公講,但講既時候要留意自己既語氣,唔好俾佢覺得妳管佢或者控制佢.切勿愈講愈激動,要一直保持平靜語氣,只須俾佢知道妳因為呢樣野好唔開心好唔安樂就得架喇.絕大部份男人於呢個情況下都會識做.



  • 快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 ! 快D離婚 !


    快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !快D離婚 !




  • 過去兩年最少有53名香港女士接受「PAAG水凝膠注射隆胸」,但最少有5,200內地女士接受「PAAG水凝膠注射隆胸」





    by ++ - 02/27/07 13:30





    港女: 53/3500000


    = 0.0015%





    內地女: 5200/600000000(仍未扣除唔識/冇錢做手術的大量村姑及農民)


    = 0.00086%





    結論: 港女遠比內地女僕.街!!!



  • e


    出手打人果個點都唔岩, 女人講得岩, 有咁快走咁快!



  • 男人, 我覺得老公是對我好的, 但當你曾經被cheat, 你對一切有保留. 很容易起疑. 我想這數年我一直很不安, 唔知點重建自信. people said that men show their love by building a shelter for women. they don't know how to talk and express by verbal or some actual body langauge. that's very sad. because that's what women need. how can i get my husband be more proactive on this?





    心痛, 你前男友另一半知道你們有contact?





    actually, last few times when things like this happened, i'd be very angry, but i didn't try anything to control, just showing him that i'd check him up sometimes after that. mostly i just cried and being upset for a few days, but he'd console me.



  • 其實....只要個男人處理得好d, 介紹兩個女人認識, 減低大家疑慮就好d架啦


    當然首要條件係個男人行得正企得正啦



  • 女人, 我無法接受那女人, 我和老公因工作而分開兩地,而我們當時的確因分隔而關係上有問題, they 因工作而走在一起. she knew my existence after they started. and we already married by that time. that's why he felt guilt towards her when he dumped her. and i forgave him. but still, when she knew she did a lot of things in order to keep the relationship, even after they separated.



  • This is exactly what my exbf's wife did. And my exbf stopped contacts with me. I dont care cos i didnt love him anymore, just felt sad that i lost a very good friend.


    However, after 5 years of no contact, he called me one day and we talked on the phone for 5 hours like we never aparted. So strange. What im trying to say is you can stop their contact and make yourself feel good, but you may killed a friendship of your husband which he valued a lot.





    by my case - 02/26/07 17:51





    勾人老公,生仔無乜乜啦你!



  • Why those bad guys have so many gal? i got nothing at all



  • 從個女人既sms, 你有無睇到佢哋有景轟?



  • actully most of the msgs i found is from her. and she'd say something not making sense. for example, one msg is about she'd return his money for the investment they did together. but i have no idea why she'd have investment with him. that's totally impossible. sound like they have a property together. my husband wouldn't have that much money. another msg is thanking him being so nice to him. also, once and only one i turn on his icq, and then i got a 'hi' msg from her immediately. with all these stuffs, i have no idea whether there's anything happened in behind, and i couldn't find anymore msgs showing that they are in contact. and my husband said he didn't understand why she said that. probably just to make me suspect something is in between them.



  • cc:


    事情發生後, 你們相處如何?


    每次見到這樣的message, 都是吵鬧收場嗎? 他會哄你嗎?


    他有沒有跟你說他和那個女子的事、他對這個女子的睇法?



  • 男人, 通常得我自己鬧, 跟住佢都有explain 足以令我化解. 我可以好易忘記. 平時相處過得去, 只是我比較cool, 唔會有太多sweet words or body language. 尚且過得去, 偏偏佢喜歡恩恩愛愛(not in public). now i think back, 佢有時都有表達, 但我只看到或留意佢有冇再背叛我. 這烘情況發生時佢唔會哄我, 只會給我分析. if i kept bugging, he'd just ignore me and left me aside. usually he'd 哄me in regular time.


    he did tell me about the story between him and that woman. but very rare to tell after the first confession.. usually msgs from her to be found out every year is about 2-3 times, he did tell me why he didn't choose her but me at the end. and he seemed not to be able to stand with her after dumping her too. as if she's doing all these harrassment in order to kill our relationship or to rebel him or me. but still, i think on one side i trust him, but on the other second, i'm not sure if something is in behind.