she sms him again....





  • my husband and I are married for a year. Prior to that, we were having a long distance relationship before reuniting in 1 country again. During that time, I found out that he and a female friend of his call each other every single night. Back then, he explained that she just broke up with her bf, and she's depressed and need to take medication for her depression. He's just helping her to get through the sad phase of her life



  • but...you don't believe?



  • when I visited him again several months later...i found that their phone calls didn't decrease at all...so I checked his email/msn...they have this sexual conversation which shocked me alot. The girl was asking him if "that' happened just because his gf (me) was having period at that time...and he replied" I felt for you when u hugged me"... and well, lots of details of what went on (sexual info)



  • I was furious and called him at his office, and he came home right away. He was angry that I checked his stuff, and he refused to admit to what he did.He said it's a joke only, coz they listened to an online sex conversation, and were just doing the same thing for fun only. To me, that's utterly bullshxt..and up till now, I'm still have this really bad feeling whenever her name appears on his cellphone



  • He finally told her that I hated their conversation, and he backed off and stopped contacting her. He really stopped calling/msn/email/sms her, and would only answer her calls/sms if it's new year, chinese New year... I appreciate his consious behavior in staying clear from her..but she still sms him sometimes just to "see if he's a live" or "how he is doing".



  • I don't know what to do... just feel depressed, but yet I couldn't let him know I know she still contact him. I dont' want him to know I checked him. sigh...why would girls do that?? he's married, I'm his wife now, why couldnt' she just leave us alone... she is beautiful, sexy...have loads of bfs...why my husband?... can anyone help me and tell me what I could do..??



  • 真係吹水.....check 清楚先啦~relax



  • sigh..I don't know what o feel or think anymore. That "situation" was back in 2005 Jan... it's already 2007 Feb now, I still couldn't let go....



  • that girl added me on msn iin 2005 around July...wanted to be my friend..wierd... she came to my wedding, but we didn't talk much. You know, sometimes you just can't "fake" friendliness right? btw, I'm glad you wrote back..I really need to talk to someone now.



  • 同佢攤牌

    冇可能05到07咁耐仲有咁親密咁联絡!



  • 客氣~

    u know i really sleepy ..

    but i would like talk to you ...we are women too



  • not intimate anymore.. from 05 March onwards (after "bau bo" in Jan) , he stopped initiating contact, and would only talk to her if she is in trouble/break up/new year, chinese new year... tonight i saw her sms asking how he is, want to know if he's doing alright.... how can I ask her to stay away....eventhough my husband has stopped contacting her, she is still tagging along.... dim suen?



  • to : . u still there?



  • 唉...e 個女仔有d qk ~

    一d 避忌都無..越扮fd 越似有計仔藏心咁!.



  • maybe, u r so nice... sigh...I think woman understand woman...why I am so "yi sum chung".... but I couldn't help it. Do you think I am over sensitive now?



  • oic



    叫你先生係你面前打俾那女仔可以嗎?



  • 唉~

    你咁諗係正常~

    但小心判錯症!



  • maybe: yeah i know! I pretended to be her friend at first..well,should say , wanna know more about her so that I know what I am dealing with...but after a while, I can't.I know I just hate her... in 05,06, she became someone elses secret lover (3rd perrson) , and got "fei" twice...so she did that depressed thing all over again, sad, crying all the time, suicidal..and call my husband again. But this time, it ended really quick, and my husband let me know what's going on.



  • ask him to call her up for what neh? I tried. Chor 1, she called at midnight, left a voicemail saying Happy Chinese New Year. My husband heard it the next day but didn't call back. So I said why don't u call her back? he said no need la. but I am sure she called again, maybe my husband didn't pick up her call, so she sms him tonight saying: mo yeah ah, just wanna know if you are still alive and ok.



  • so I guess my husband did reply her by sms asking her what's up.... but guess what? I couldnt' find any sms to her, miss call etc with her phone number..so my husband must have deleted it on purpose.



  • 話說回來

    解藥係你先生

    藥引係他要給你more more 信任感俾你

    而你亦要俾番d信心佢!



  • maybe...I understand your view point. That's what my husband complains about, that I don't trust him at all.... sometimes it's just hard to trust...because he hurt me so deep that time... + that lady is still around.... sorry to keep you up, you must be very tired



  • 其實你老公好唔識趣,佢應該叫個女仔避忌吓啦~佢係使人好敏感...易出風溼熱....



    依個女仔亦好借d以lor~老實!又唔見佢一sent sms 就for family ....扮嘢d lor~



  • maybe : have to sleep..getting late. Wish to hear more from other people...Men: please let me know your thoughts too.. coz I am lost... totally lost.



  • you are totally right. She sent me an sms during New Years' Eve (send to everyone of her friends) , so I got it too. My husband then called her to say "happy new year" and chat for 4-5 mins. I am ok with that, but like u said, just don't always do it...make me feel very uncomfortable...



  • sorry, typed in the wrong alias...haha. stupid me.previous message was typed by me.



  • 我過來人啦~我明喎....係幾tired吓,so 傾多一振我睏嘞!okay?!



    冇喎!不如你同個女仔講你唔高興佢係你同丈夫之間出現,擺到明~



    i don't like you ~gal 咁!冇計喎~直接d~弩好托!早d 了她~感覺同機會難d deep 嘛!



    u can say i bad ka i don't care ~

    為保家園!



  • maybe...the problem is , we have lots of common friends with this girl... would it make me look very "siu ga'? (small family)



  • main thing is, I dont' want my husbadn to lose face in front of his friends... our "common friends" are all his friends. I mean the ones she knows



  • 其實大家都識佢唔洗咁瞹昧囉!



    你要防

    你老公

    and 絕咗依個gal gal 囉!



  • 咋家依傳俾你d fd 聽....u must !



  • mabelle, it looks like you cannot 'take it easy' on this matter. even your husband do nothing to that gal.



  • u 治你老公禁佢同佢私下來往



    小家就siu ga~氣頂頂~pu 可 e~



  • 防你老公 <-- I'm doing it.. like tonight, i deleted her sms..so he won't reply for sure coz he didn't get the sms.



    絕咗依個gal gal <--haha...ai...to be honest, if I were her, I won't be so thick skin and still call the guy up. He already stopped contacting her... she still show up. He told her I don't like them to be close friends...and she still call... gum dim? I don't think what I said would mean anything to her ... even if I call her and say : hey I want you to stop contacting my husband. she will definitely feel "ha? u talking to me?" I nearly called her to scold her quite a few times... but I stopped...coz I dont' want my husband to feel "larn sau" later when he sees her when we meet up with common friends.



  • 個 gal 咁主動...zzz



  • 氣頂頂 <-- ? over with this phase la... now more like sad and uncomfortable..like waiting for another time bomb to explode... I hate the fact that she can come and disturb us when she can...ho tou yim!!! (sorry, I can't type chinese)



  • if you do this 'little action', i'm sure your husband angry of you becoz it. as you know well, men need faces.

    And, he already isolated that gal coz afraid your jealous and queries. what you want he do for you anymore? The point is you don't trust ur husband and not confident on u both.



  • yes, she is very 主動....I know she can sleep with guys she just got to know on the first night.... so imagine.. hot, sexy, beautiful and 主動... I feel extremely vulnerable. People say I'm pretty...but compare to her..I feel I'm nothing....



  • tired tired...let's go to sleep and talk later.

    add this thread to you message box la. We continue later :) nice having u around to talk tonight...feel abit better.



  • she is not thick skin so simple....she is 發哂姣....





    tell your hunband know u hate her soooo much which would u like ?me or the thick skin gal sin?



  • iam_aman : I know...after this incident, I truly lost confidence in him...in us.. Not that I dont' want to build trust...but with this girl lurking around....it's difficult.



  • i just wonder if you keep this attitude on this case, your husband must leave you someday later. He only treats her as friend only, what you want he do for you more?



  • iam_aman : if your wife does the same thing..can you :take it easy? I tried...for 2 yrs, God knows I tried... getting better at it...2 yrs ago, I could remember every single words they wrote in their msn/email...my darkest terror.. now , I would only think of it maybe once in half a year.... or feel uncomfortable when she "appears"....



  • okok



    我去眠~



    aman

    唔得啦~衣種gal gal 真要出此下策喎~她都不訓輸...



    and 佢丈夫亦可圈可點就講完la...



    好啦~

    真眠啦~



    goodnight~all



  • iam_aman : I know he's done his part..and now just treating her as friend...I know.... just couldn't help it. I've stopped asking him about her mostly..maybe ask if she called once in 2 months? he would tell me she called/sms whatever if I ask, but won't tell me on his own accord.That I understand, who wants " 1 sun" ants



  • be frank, is he do anything also cannot repair the trust between you 2? you have to think it seriously.



  • night night maybe. thanks for the talk. 佢丈夫亦可圈可點就講完la... <-- sigh..



  • iam_aman : u know what? good question. If you ask e what he can do to repair our relationship...maybe first thing is not to reply her sms at all..I mean, 100% no contact with her...and I'll feel much better.... but then, I also notice myself "2 sum" very very strong after that incident.... I know it's very "tou yim" and hard for him to understand too... tell me how I can gain trust in him again?



  • iam_aman



    你都唔明..那種火滚....

    個女仔咁明

    她丈夫又咁willing didi it ~u know!?!


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