Is honesty on past important?



  • I and my gf have been togther for over a year. We are deeply in love.



    However, one thing is bothering us. 



    She refuses to completely share with me her past relationships. She lied to me about certain of her past relationships. When I raised my concern, she still refused to admit that she lied and accused me of being pushy. 



    I do not mind about her past. I will accept her past, no matter what it is. Just that I think honesty and open sharing is very important in long term in a relationship.



    Character of a person cannot be changed. I am worried that i may not be able to bear her stubborness and   任性 in long term.



    i love her very much. i do not want to give up. But her stubborness and 任性 are hurting me. I am unhappy



  • to a certain extent, yes.



  • "Character of a person cannot be changed. I am worried that i may not be able to bear her stubborness and   ?ocirc;?Ecirc; in long term."



    ===> agree! Im giving up a man for the very same reason.



  • to r: did u love him much? hard for me to give her up.



  • he lied about everything... not just the past relationships.... it's his character. I gave him many chances and i dont see he's gonna change... 

    One day you will... cos you wont be happy with her in the long run. Take your time... either she change or you give up.



  • 你話佢固執? 咁你迫佢講又算係乜呢?



  • well... if u think i am feeling upset about her not telling me something i want to know is stubborn, I am. The key is how we see the importance of the thing I am trying to ask



  • how do you know she lied to you? Are you fully opened to her? Sometimes it takes time for people to open up and it seems that she is not confident enough that you will 'accept her as what she is' as you claimed.



  • 每個人著緊既野都唔同, 你點可能將你個套完全放落佢度呢? 何況依家已經出現反效果? 如果你有野唔想講, 你背後一定有你原因, 但係, 你未必一世都唔講, 只係要等時機, 你明白嗎? 你連自己 "迫" 緊對方都唔在意, 佢點解要在意你著緊既所謂坦白呢?



  • There was a married guy she dated. She doesnt know that I have known that guy since i was a child. I have known the romance even before i met her. She kept denying it. I do not mind at all. I just get upset that she lied to me.



  • wow.... no wonder you are upset


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