if you ever into love, i need your advice....badly



  • first of all, thanks for checking in. second, i am desperate for your advice. here is the situation:



    i split up with my gf 2 months ago. she still love me but i no longer do. she is having very difficult time. now as her friend (we both want friends afterall), i feel sad and wondering i could be a help to ease her pain, or simply, just leave her alone, and let her manage herself.....? puzzle....hope i got some serious advice.....thanks in advacne!!!!



  • ooo....seem no one's interested in my boring thread....



  • Hi Jerk,





    It's not becuz of the boring subject. It's holiday today that not much people here.


    You said you wanna offer help. Then what kind of help you'd like to offer? Treating her well again? If you don't love her anymore, it's no point to do something that makes her misunderstanding. Do cruel this moment can help her for better life in the future. If she is still missing you. How can she relief and look for new love/life? Think about it, you maybe wasting for her time. You should understand, the lady's time is more important, haha.



  • thanks heap! applegreentea! now watching a tv drama talking about angel, and suddenly you seem one to me, haha.





    we both clear that we couldnt be lovers, but definitely be friends, a quality one. so, i figure misunderstanding is not likely. and what kind of help, thats a good question....suddenly speechless.





    i set rules for myself of not seeing her in the cmoing months. the only contact would only be online. would that be a good idea to listen to her through online, i mean, msn, email, or letter...?





    applegreentea, what do you think?



  • Hi Jerk,





    Believe or not. I've came cross for so many similar case, either my fds or me. It's just kinda bull shxt for "quality ordinary friends". At least it's impossible to make it just after separation. Don't think that you're an exceptional case. It is always silly to think that way. I don't want to pour you cold water. Unless you guys may re-union again (not a bad stuff indeed), I don't think it's a gd idea to do such act. But of cuz, it's up to your choices. Frankly speaking, I don't think you'll stop. So mine maybe kinda bull shxt as well.



  • hey A G Tea (its kinda cool abbreviation),





    on the contratary, i think all the way same as yours, what you told aint BS but familiar to me. the thing is: i am struggling if i could do something for her, but i realise i would screw up with good intention....maybe, the best to do is to do nothing......AG, agree?



  • hello JJ





    I think u should stay away from her for a few months, you should not give her any false hopes, she will eventually let go and maybe by that time, you 2 can be friends again.



  • hey tuesday, thanks for your advice. and right, i should stop being stupid figuring how to save her while i am the one to kill her...



  • Hi Jerk,





    Yep. What you do make you looks like fake guy. So stop doing such shxt things, haha.



  • i know, thanks janice. step back, and do nothing



  • if she send u sms, dont reply. if she calls you, just talk for a min or 2 then hang up. dont chat on msn or email....every single response u give her, no matter how little, it will give her false hope .. remember, dont even send her birthday greetings.. u need to stay away from her for at least 6 months or until she finds a new bf.





    well, i finally let go of him after we had no contact for 1.5 yrs



  • passerby. gosh! it took you 1.5 years to get rid of him. truth to be told, you gave me firm affirmation and big push of being absolute to her..........thanks heap!!!!!



  • Hi Jerk,





    I believe what passby said. I've separated with my ex-ex- for 4 yrs already. He is still in my mind. If he would come back to me, I think I'll say yes thousands time.



  • and within the 1.5 yr, i sent him greetings on his birthday, christmas, and new year and whenever i missed him. he only replied on the new year greeting and sent me a birthday sms..but you just don't know how delighted i was. That's when my imaginations started to drift away again... thinking that he still have me in his heart....


    now when i look back, if he didnt sms me at all, i guess it shouldnt take me that long to let go of him



  • AppleGreenTea replied @ 2008-07-01 9:37 pm





    .... He is still in my mind. If he would come back to me, I think I'll say yes thousands time.





    ***************


    same here, i think i would love to get together with him again, just that 只怕不再遇上



  • 我用左三年時間去降低會對對方做成既傷害, 直至佢自己放棄我先離去.


    好耐之前, 我傷過一個女仔, 當然我好明白成情創有幾痛苦, 所以今次用好長既時間去冷卻呢段關係, 令對方可以自然而冇痛咁離開, 問題係, 你肯唔肯 "付出" 時間.



  • i really agree with AGT and passerby..



  • thank you all for your great advice!!!!!!!!!!!! AGREE, ".", AG TEA, PASSERBY, JANICE, TUESDAY


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