Is it reasonable for a married man to seek sex from an alternative source if the women he loves



  • faceout,

    2 marriages?? what do you mean?



    35lady

    ic....7months not short while ago, why break up?



  • daisy, really?? then, we might be an old old frds then as i didnt use the name for long, :-) hows day going for u recently??? :-)



    i totally agreed yr idea nowaday :-)



  • allow me to say... so an selfish thought!

    princessdaisy -why not, welcom yr adv. but as i say, i know what i need and do now....



  • faceout,

    not about your alias, i recognize the way you speak. and you are quite active lately... anyways, i am not here to talk about when we did chat. :)



  • kelly- we hd great time within 5 months, so happy together, not only for sex....., he is too busy and no more time for me, so he want break........



  • I have the similar situation with you guys, my wife after having BB, we had not make love over 1 and a half year. I think is the time spend on take care of BB and less focus on me.

    I can accept and understand. However, without sex it will affect the relationship with a couple.



  • daisy, seem u can really read thr me :-) i m here recently as i hv some changes in my life lately, giving me an excuse to release for while here, i alwys think its not a good place to stay for long,



    i just think ppl will change only with certain experiences, just let 35lady n guy go as its still not yet the time for them, :-)



  • 35 lady,

    of coz you need what you want as you already put it in action.

    人不為己, 天諸天免. this is always true.



    however, just that i guess you guys having the thought for another affair (or already did it) can stop listing why you need an affair, just admit love fades or being naughty or whatever, but not kind of 美化 your own self and makes it less guilty.



    sorry i'm being straight forward but i'm with no offence. :)



  • daisy, give me 5!!!



  • daisy

    but forgive me saying this...this is sex forum here

    what u said may not what they want to hear



  • kelly, FIVE!

    :)



  • i am not 美化 or want to hid my guilty........i know i am wrong but just want make my life a bit brighter..in my boring live......



  • hahhaa, sound u 2 r rebellious, hahahaa



  • daisy

    you experience those situation before?



  • kelly,

    for sure i know... i've been here for quite a while, i've seen many different cases. and since here is sex forum, they dont need to find an excuse to fool around, just admit their weakness and get what they want.



    besides, it's never good to make themselves less guilty by telling it's the other half not able to give sex that makes the relationship fragile.



  • 35 lady,

    that's good for you to admit it's for your own good.

    but if you rely on relationship to give us a bright life, how many relationship we should chase after in order to keep the light forever in our life?



  • kelly, the marriages for 35 lady and guy, hahaha



    anyway, i just think NO PAIN, NO GAIN! we can do nothing abt that!



  • daisy, moral and basic desire is always again each other.Human had the right to choose and freedom to choose.

    However, if no sex with wife and morally we cannot accept SL, SP. Sex with hooker is also immoral. The only method is to seperate. Is it the final choice? Please comment



  • different think in different age.......may be stable in my rest life.......who's know



  • karmasung & 35 lady,

    please understand i'm not against anything, i'm not a "moralist" myself. i am not trying to discuss about moral or immoral... and having an outside affair is NOT wrong, and who to judge? no one.



    just be ourselves and admit our weakness, that's all.

    not ever blame the other half for not be able to do this and that...



  • daisy, faceout



    you have been here for a while? so you stay here for chat?

    no pain no gain...of course!!



  • prince- i never blame my half in my all message.......i try my best to talk with him......if i dun care him, i will separate or run away..........



  • not ever blame the other half for not be able to do this and that...



    i totally agree that, my bf give me privacy, time and freedom..on the otherhand, i will give him those also.....just two trust each other is good enough, if someone break the rules and use the ad of those to cheat others, then the relationship is over....



  • kelly, used to be here in the difficult time, why u here then?



  • 35lady,

    any help after talked with him? may i ask, who dun want to have sex?



  • faceout



    am here just because i got time recently dur to cny holiday

    was away for years :p



  • kelly - nothing help after several talk, of course he dun want,



  • kelly, seem u r those kind who hv to back work on 18th, right? :-)



  • 35 lady,

    well, i dont actually mean you blame, but is that the reason for your an outside affair? :)



    i somehow feel it so strange for you guys...

    seems to me that wrapping the outside affair with the word "secret LOVER" would make it more acceptable as love involved.



  • btw, 35 lady, i know a lady, who is suberb in both family and work, she has been married over 15 yrs i guess, and still is deeply in love with her hubby (so as his hubby) ... she told us this:



    每段關係都需要營造, 需要努力. 但係好多人因為新鮮感, 因為刺激, 所以不段尋找婚外關係... 以為咁為可以 rejuvenate. 當outside affair 無左新鮮感... 又再尋... 結果, 一世就只係尋找, 但一世都尋找唔到.



  • in fact , i hv same idea with u before .....but as i said different thinkig in different age.....i dun want to hurt anyone in my real heart...that's all



  • princess- you misunderstand, i am not looking for 新鮮感 and 刺激, if i am, i can looking for ons/sp........no I am not, i think i search other way to relax my pressure,i still 努力 keep my marriage.........that's all



  • faceout

    i start worked already, just kinda slow motion these days, haha, how about u?

    35lady

    ur husband has no needs ?

    daisy

    agree ur friend says, but sometimes need to have luck to have another half has that thought also



  • 35 lady,

    hahhaa... you are getting sensitive

    i'm sorry if i sounded offensive.



    that was just a quote i like, dont get me wrong and i'm not judging you at all, i'm just nobody after all. :)



  • 35 lady,

    that's why i mentioned, it's good for you to admit to yourself it's for your own need for such an affair... i didnt say it's wrong.



  • kelly- his excuse is busy lor and tired,



  • princess- take it easy, i never requst anyone to accept what i did and no need.......



  • kelly, fighting for my works few days ago, just want to hv a relax weekend at home, take a bit rest and waiting for the big match in tonight :-)



    where is yr bf then? not hanging ard with him?



  • 35lady

    how about go to vacation with him? at that time then not tired and busy la

    faceout

    big match? football?

    tonight i have plan with my gf , so not hang out with guys today

    i have no bf yet, just dating recently, u are married also?



  • kelly, i m divorced, didnt get used to any relationship now, i know i want to get one finally in my life as who dont want? :-) , however, just never hurry!!



    its good to hv sb to hanging around , right? haha



    btw, there will hv a cup match for manutd and asenral tonight, expecting an exciting match, :-)



    what u like to do in yr leisure?



  • faceout

    hope you find ur ms right soon

    sorry i am not a football fans, so i duno abt it

    leisure time ...rest...travel...sports....all kind of things ..u?



  • kelly,



    exercise, exercise, and exercise, hahaha, i m just a boring guy with exercise for leisure, :-)



    what kind of sports u like then???



    all kind of things?? hahah, seem remarkable,:-P



  • I wonder if any of you will hook up with each other in the end. ;)



    the whole cycle just perpetuates.



    debating --> building relationship --> hook-up --> break up --> debating



  • carrie

    you have good imagination , lol~



  • i'll feel guilty if i spend money and time with someone other than my wife and kids in return for affections :(



  • Daisy, I think when someone review inside one's heart. Will discover love no one but just oneself. SP SL or anyone is just a refection of the inner desire, lonely and afraid. Most people include me don't know how to deal with them. Please comment



  • I also wonder same as Carrie if people here will find each other.. Maybe '35lady' should find 'just guy'...he did leave his contact.



    but i agree with kelly and daisy, no need to complain - either put up with the situation or do something about it but theink abuot the people u say u love if u do find another for sex



  • In my case, if I feel guilty, I would not start the relationship.



    I enjoy the secret time with other guys, as long as they are not my official one. :P



  • Hi Candy.



    nowaday, it is hard to find some interesting topic to chat in SHE. at least most of them are not interested by me. :(



  • Hi Old lady, is the 'official one' yuor husband or bf


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