唔知係咪我自己唔岩,有人可以幫我分析下嗎?



  • 我男朋友係外國人,住係US,我地計劃出年或09年結婚,因為我過到去US都唔知幾時可以揾到野做,但係佢尋日同我講話唔會比零用錢我,重問我:don't u have saving? 我同佢講話有,但係始終都會用曬,佢先話會take care me for food..,但係我知佢唔係好願意



  • 無野做我都唔想,好唔開心



  • 呢個係文化問題,大家文化唔同,無話邊個岩邊個錯



  • 但係如果個男主角係香港人?



  • zoe,


    可能真係吧,但係我覺得佢好似覺得自己付出好多咁,重話我earn nothing







  • 路過,


    我唔知道,好難如果架喎,係香港既話我一定會做野的



  • hmm....我想你考慮清楚先....





    我知有d case 個女仔去到個邊, 個男既唔知點解唔肯結婚..最後個女仔冇計之下唯有番番泥...





    小心分析下啦



  • 咁你原本係唸住點架?? 唸住佢會養你?? 養你幾多年?? 呢個祈望好似大左d喎



  • SunFlowerA


    原本都係諗住做野,不過唔肯定會幾時揾到,我諗我會降低要求,但求可以有工做就好了



  • 其實如果係佢黎香港會唔會容易搵工??



  • DON


    其實我最壞打算都係咁



  • SunFlowerA


    我地有諗過,但係佢話佢揾唔番E+個人工



  • as





    當然,我唔知佢係乜人, 又唔知你幾認識佢.





    但我知有d 鬼佬係咁樣, 無論有冇計劃都好, 好多時去到個邊就會有問題出現...





    咁你都可以從佢平時既行為知佢尊唔尊重你既..





    佢做邊行架? 其實好多鬼佬係香港都可以搵到比自己hometown 人工高d, 由其係外資公司



  • DON


    佢係telecom公司做development,其實佢公司係HK有office ,佢派黎果陣我地識




  • 咁更加冇理由wor.... 通常hq 調過泥, housing + allowance 都有一舊錢啦, 而且外資公司好興泥到香港就高一兩個grade (say supervisor in US -> manager in HK, technican -> Senior Engineer etc).





    你地識左幾耐架?? 最好你有假期去睇下個邊d 環境適唔適合你先,如果結左婚先發覺唔啱就問題仲大



  • DON


    but佢己經調走左,我唔知佢人工幾多呀


    同埋佢公司無再派人黎,所以佢話如果佢揾過一份新工係HK,佢揾唔返咁多


    咁裡個都可能只係其中一個reason



  • 我地識左有成5年,但係一直財政非常獨立



  • as,





    Actually, many Americans are like that.


    They may make pretty good money, but husband and wife accounts are seperated.


    I would say most couples are living in this way.


    They are not being mean to you. But that's the way is.





    Their sense of manhood is different from chinese.


    Manhood for them is to carry/ fix stuff, but not include sharing income with you. You make less than him is OK, but usually he won't expect to support you financially.





    Don't worry about finding job in US.


    Usually there are lots of restaurants around.


    You can work as waitress. It actually make pretty good money.


    You can work there before you find a perm job.



  • as,





    You are lucky as you brought up this topic before you got married.


    I have seen some cases are like yours.





    An Japanese lady married a American guy.


    She worked and had saving before she left to US.


    Right after she delivered her kid, her husband asked her to work.


    Working as night shift part time grocery is fine.


    He simply doesnt want her to spend his money.


    But the thing is she cannot really speak english and has to take care of their kid.


    Their relationship is really messy.



  • 明白...


    其實認識五年, 都應該唔淺了, 你最好告假去個便生活下, 知道下自己得唔得, 如果真係唔得, 就睇下值唔值再keep 呢段關係或者睇下點解決





    我開頭係驚你遇到d 會呃你過去, 玩完就唔要既鬼,因為我見過有d 真係咁,又話自己單身又盛, 去到原來有仔有女, 當我地係玩具...所以諗法有少少負面... 去睇清楚啦





    現代女仔, 財政獨立好緊要, 但你男友咁諗係咪你之前比佢image 好大洗呢? 如果唔係佢好似幾姑寒wor



  • R


    Yes, that's wht I am thinking.... y he's being mean to me....of cos I don't mind to share bills w/him in HK, when I hav the job....


    I think I'll take ur suggestion to work for temp job first


    many thx!



  • DON


    我又真係幾大洗的...OMG


    e+我會轉一下我既心態,當去果邊生活下


    我地一齊係好開心,但係拍拖同結婚始終係2回事,rite?


    Thx^^



  • as,





    我都覺得你應該take個trip過黎US住吓, 睇吓慣唔慣先, 我同你情況都差唔多, 過到黎頭半年不知幾唔習慣, 日日都想走, 好在我妹妹都響呢邊, 先好過d咋... 但, 依家成年幾都仲覺得呢邊好悶架....





    我honey係ABC, 都係冇比零用我架, 但其他開資會負責曬, 我"meet"到saving 差不多見底先去搵野做, 幸好, 都好快搵到, 我覺得呢邊搵工其實仲易過香港, d interview 冇咁嚴謹, hehhee...



  • as,





    我都覺得你應該take個trip過黎US住吓, 睇吓慣唔慣先, 我同你情況都差唔多, 過到黎頭半年不知幾唔習慣, 日日都想走, 好在我妹妹都響呢邊, 先好過d咋... 但, 依家成年幾都仲覺得呢邊好悶架....





    我honey係ABC, 都係冇比零用我架, 但其他開資會負責曬, 我"meet"到saving 差不多見底先去搵野做, 幸好, 都好快搵到, 我覺得呢邊搵工其實仲易過香港, d interview 冇咁嚴謹, hehhee...



  • 可能外國人興AA制



  • From several couples (married - Asians+Americans) who I know they have alreaddy got a very clear thought in managing their finance before and after get married. Before get married, it is his/her money but it becomes their money after get married. A friend got a divorce just last year due to his wife (filipna) sent money home without letting him know.



  • sv 講的都係真的,





    生活係悶過香港, 工係容易搵到, 但唔係american, 就唔好expect 會係好高薪, 同係香港會低grade d...





    有冇朋友係個邊? 佢地好少一至四出去食飯, clubbing. 有d couple 去到個邊會有argue coz time for them alone is much longer then in HK.





    so i really suggest you to go there and stay short for some kinda of life and then decide.





    試下先啦



  • as,





    Yeah. I think he wont blame you if you share part of the bills.


    (*Warning: Americans work so hard to pay bills. So you can imagine how expensive they are.)





    Life in US isnt that bad. (Unless you stay in NYC)


    You will find yourself have lots of time at home.


    Basically its another kind of enjoyment since the house is big.



  • as,


    BTW,


    how do you keep the relationship with your bf?


    how long have you been apart from him?








    DON,


    umm...


    Actually, you can make very good money even you are chinese.


    It really depends on how good you are.


    You will see how chinese dominate in college, IT, trading, research.


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