唔知係咪我自己唔岩，有人可以幫我分析下嗎？
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我男朋友係外國人，住係US,我地計劃出年或09年結婚,因為我過到去US都唔知幾時可以揾到野做，但係佢尋日同我講話唔會比零用錢我,重問我：don't u have saving? 我同佢講話有,但係始終都會用曬,佢先話會take care me for food..，但係我知佢唔係好願意
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無野做我都唔想，好唔開心
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呢個係文化問題，大家文化唔同，無話邊個岩邊個錯
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但係如果個男主角係香港人?
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zoe,
<br>可能真係吧,但係我覺得佢好似覺得自己付出好多咁，重話我earn nothing
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路過，
<br>我唔知道,好難如果架喎,係香港既話我一定會做野的
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hmm....我想你考慮清楚先....
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<br>我知有d case 個女仔去到個邊, 個男既唔知點解唔肯結婚..最後個女仔冇計之下唯有番番泥...
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<br>小心分析下啦
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咁你原本係唸住點架?? 唸住佢會養你?? 養你幾多年?? 呢個祈望好似大左d喎
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SunFlowerA
<br>原本都係諗住做野,不過唔肯定會幾時揾到，我諗我會降低要求,但求可以有工做就好了
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其實如果係佢黎香港會唔會容易搵工??
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DON
<br>其實我最壞打算都係咁
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SunFlowerA
<br>我地有諗過,但係佢話佢揾唔番Ｅ＋個人工
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as
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<br>當然,我唔知佢係乜人, 又唔知你幾認識佢.
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<br>但我知有d 鬼佬係咁樣, 無論有冇計劃都好, 好多時去到個邊就會有問題出現...
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<br>咁你都可以從佢平時既行為知佢尊唔尊重你既..
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<br>佢做邊行架? 其實好多鬼佬係香港都可以搵到比自己hometown 人工高d, 由其係外資公司
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DON
<br>佢係telecom公司做development,其實佢公司係ＨＫ有office ,佢派黎果陣我地識
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咁更加冇理由wor.... 通常hq 調過泥, housing + allowance 都有一舊錢啦, 而且外資公司好興泥到香港就高一兩個grade (say supervisor in US -> manager in HK, technican -> Senior Engineer etc).
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<br>你地識左幾耐架?? 最好你有假期去睇下個邊d 環境適唔適合你先,如果結左婚先發覺唔啱就問題仲大
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DON
<br>but佢己經調走左，我唔知佢人工幾多呀
<br>同埋佢公司無再派人黎,所以佢話如果佢揾過一份新工係ＨＫ,佢揾唔返咁多
<br>咁裡個都可能只係其中一個reason
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我地識左有成5年,但係一直財政非常獨立
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as,
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<br>Actually, many Americans are like that.
<br>They may make pretty good money, but husband and wife accounts are seperated.
<br>I would say most couples are living in this way.
<br>They are not being mean to you. But that's the way is.
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<br>Their sense of manhood is different from chinese.
<br>Manhood for them is to carry/ fix stuff, but not include sharing income with you. You make less than him is OK, but usually he won't expect to support you financially.
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<br>Don't worry about finding job in US.
<br>Usually there are lots of restaurants around.
<br>You can work as waitress. It actually make pretty good money.
<br>You can work there before you find a perm job.
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as,
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<br>You are lucky as you brought up this topic before you got married.
<br>I have seen some cases are like yours.
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<br>An Japanese lady married a American guy.
<br>She worked and had saving before she left to US.
<br>Right after she delivered her kid, her husband asked her to work.
<br>Working as night shift part time grocery is fine.
<br>He simply doesnt want her to spend his money.
<br>But the thing is she cannot really speak english and has to take care of their kid.
<br>Their relationship is really messy.
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明白...
<br>其實認識五年, 都應該唔淺了, 你最好告假去個便生活下, 知道下自己得唔得, 如果真係唔得, 就睇下值唔值再keep 呢段關係或者睇下點解決
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<br>我開頭係驚你遇到d 會呃你過去, 玩完就唔要既鬼,因為我見過有d 真係咁,又話自己單身又盛, 去到原來有仔有女, 當我地係玩具...所以諗法有少少負面... 去睇清楚啦
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<br>現代女仔, 財政獨立好緊要, 但你男友咁諗係咪你之前比佢image 好大洗呢? 如果唔係佢好似幾姑寒wor
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R
<br>Yes, that's wht I am thinking.... y he's being mean to me....of cos I don't mind to share bills w/him in HK, when I hav the job....
<br>I think I'll take ur suggestion to work for temp job first
<br>many thx!
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DON
<br>我又真係幾大洗的...OMG
<br>e+我會轉一下我既心態,當去果邊生活下
<br>我地一齊係好開心,但係拍拖同結婚始終係2回事,rite?
<br>Thx^^
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as,
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<br>我都覺得你應該take個trip過黎US住吓, 睇吓慣唔慣先, 我同你情況都差唔多, 過到黎頭半年不知幾唔習慣, 日日都想走, 好在我妹妹都響呢邊, 先好過d咋... 但, 依家成年幾都仲覺得呢邊好悶架....
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<br>我honey係ABC, 都係冇比零用我架, 但其他開資會負責曬, 我"meet"到saving 差不多見底先去搵野做, 幸好, 都好快搵到, 我覺得呢邊搵工其實仲易過香港, d interview 冇咁嚴謹, hehhee...
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as,
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<br>我都覺得你應該take個trip過黎US住吓, 睇吓慣唔慣先, 我同你情況都差唔多, 過到黎頭半年不知幾唔習慣, 日日都想走, 好在我妹妹都響呢邊, 先好過d咋... 但, 依家成年幾都仲覺得呢邊好悶架....
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<br>我honey係ABC, 都係冇比零用我架, 但其他開資會負責曬, 我"meet"到saving 差不多見底先去搵野做, 幸好, 都好快搵到, 我覺得呢邊搵工其實仲易過香港, d interview 冇咁嚴謹, hehhee...
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可能外國人興AA制
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From several couples (married - Asians+Americans) who I know they have alreaddy got a very clear thought in managing their finance before and after get married. Before get married, it is his/her money but it becomes their money after get married. A friend got a divorce just last year due to his wife (filipna) sent money home without letting him know.
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sv 講的都係真的,
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<br>生活係悶過香港, 工係容易搵到, 但唔係american, 就唔好expect 會係好高薪, 同係香港會低grade d...
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<br>有冇朋友係個邊? 佢地好少一至四出去食飯, clubbing. 有d couple 去到個邊會有argue coz time for them alone is much longer then in HK.
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<br>so i really suggest you to go there and stay short for some kinda of life and then decide.
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<br>試下先啦
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as,
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<br>Yeah. I think he wont blame you if you share part of the bills.
<br>(*Warning: Americans work so hard to pay bills. So you can imagine how expensive they are.)
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<br>Life in US isnt that bad. (Unless you stay in NYC)
<br>You will find yourself have lots of time at home.
<br>Basically its another kind of enjoyment since the house is big.
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as,
<br>BTW,
<br>how do you keep the relationship with your bf?
<br>how long have you been apart from him?
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<br>DON,
<br>umm...
<br>Actually, you can make very good money even you are chinese.
<br>It really depends on how good you are.
<br>You will see how chinese dominate in college, IT, trading, research.